


Drugged

by catastrophage



Category: Fear the Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Drug Abuse, Drugged Sex, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, Language, Love Confessions, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, Smut, s03ep14
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-15
Updated: 2017-10-15
Packaged: 2019-01-17 17:42:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12370740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catastrophage/pseuds/catastrophage
Summary: He swallowed the pill, chugged it with his soda.This was not what Troy would have liked their first date to be like.I recommend the entire work view, the chapters are short.





	1. Hopes & Confessions

**Hopes & Confessions**

He wasn't sure when he realized it. Was it when they were fighting side by side, back in his house? When he lowered the gun after initially pointing it at him? Was it when he saw him standing on the balcony, leaning against the railing, smoking at night? Was it when Nick saved him from the rage of his brother? Was it in the helicopter, when they had all the fun preparing to die? Or was it before, when they rolled on the ground of the desert, threatening to kill each other but never really doing it...

Troy didn't know when it happened or how, he just knew it had happened when he was alone with Nick, when he noticed he needed him, wanted him, wished to be close to him. He had never known what it would feel like until it had happened. Never had he felt the same before, be it because nobody was suited, or because nobody had treated him decently his whole life.

And then there was Nick. High on life, just as fucked as him, not afraid and absolutely beautiful. He was a killer, merciless if he wanted it so. He did not care about last words, did not care about mourning, did not care about Troy's little power games and manipulation. And yet he was so pure, could laugh from his heart, smile in situations in which others would have stared in shock.  
He was the first person Troy met, whom he did not need to manipulate nor to allow manipulating him, who would still accept him and stay around. The first person he did not look up to for reasons of power, but to whom he could look up to out of honest respect. The first person he knew who could speak his mind around him, and to whom he felt he could be honest to as well.

Besides one thing.

The fact that he loved him.

Troy thought he would go crazy after 75 hours without sleep, maybe more. But it all went smoothly. He found time to sleep, and could enjoy a day of driving through the desert alone with Nick. And then it slipped. It was a conversation that started sincere and matter-of-factly, but Troy caught himself laughing. "It's bullshit." He said it once more. "It's bullshit!"

The grumpy look on Nick's face made him smile more. He had just found a way to say it, to reverse it so he could not be turned down. He had found a way to say it without getting hurt.

"All right. You stayed at the ranch because you love me."

Nick did not say a word. He did not agree, but did not deny it either. He smiled - finally - after so many hours of bad mood. Even just for this reaction, Troy decided it was worth it. He kept talking.  
"You know, you and me, we are more alike than you think. Black sheep. Children of violence. It's just, you wish you weren't."

Nick stared at him as if he thought he was out of his mind. Or as if he was realizing something. Troy hoped for the latter. It was a faint hope, but it burned like a candle in the darkness that would keep him alive for just a little bit longer.


	2. Drugged

**Drugged**

Troy almost got angry. There he sat, drugged, obviously. He had brought some pills and told him he had a head start. Said that Troy needed to catch up. "No," Troy whispered. Then he saw Nick ordering shots. "I don't drink. Nick. I don't drink." Dejavus crept up his mind, dejavus of his drunken mother and father. They seemed just as happy as Nick right there. And then they got angry. Or crazy and violent. They would neglect him, ignore him, abandon him. If they could have sold him for booze, they would have done it, Troy was sure of it.  
His heart was bleeding when he saw Nick turn out just the way his parents did. Nick had been the last person he could rely on, his last straw. The last person he wanted to be around, for the last couple of days in his life.

The first person he fell in love with.

The person whom he wanted to die with side by side.

He looked at Nick, who had just emptied the shots himself with another one of his pills. And then Troy decided that if this would be the end, if this would be the actual day he died, he could as well abandon the last of his morals. If just to keep Nick from having one more pill, or to get onto the same level of intoxication, to meet him at his point of high for the first and last time.

He swallowed the pill, chugged it with his soda.

And then he followed him.

His memory blurred. One moment he still was at the bar, the next moment they were up on the stadium ranks. He saw Nick talking to two young Mexicans who looked suspiciously gay. Feelings were triggered: jealousy, denial, disapproval, but he felt sluggish and unable to express anything.  
So this was what it felt like not to care?

Then the slaughterhouse. Troy had forgotten what the Mexicans had called it. He just wanted to get out, but Nick obviously just wanted to get in further. He pulled him along, made him eat something weird he did not want to eat. No matter how much Troy tried to argue, to pull him back, he never succeeded. And then he gave in, pushed past his limits by the adrenaline of his new high.

How ever they got there, Troy found it incredibly funny how they managed to bust out of the stadium. And Nick laughed with him, what warmed his heart. He heard himself say something about getting an actual heart attack, but Nick made fun of it.

Finally, Nick was close to him, grabbing his shirt, holding onto him so he would not fall over. Troy would never have admitted how much he had yearned for this physical contact. And then he saw it, a small herd of the undead. "Nick," he hissed. "Nick!" But the teenager was out of his mind. He smudged blood all over Troy's face, told him to use more, did the same to his face and clothes.

Troy's heart sank. He felt the effects of the drugs wearing off very fast. Only worries were left. "Nick!" he said again, but he could not stop him running towards the herd. So this was how it would end, he thought to himself. Eaten alive. He followed, ready to die whichever death Nick had chosen for them, but it made his heart ache and his legs shake.

It never happened. The zombies walked around them, treating them as if they were invisible. Troy found himself standing in the midst of the herd, reaching out for Nick who teased the dead. "I can't go back," whispered the younger. Scared what they would do to him once they noticed he was alive, Troy pulled him into his arms.

He didn't know how long it took them, standing there, holding onto each other, hugging tightly. Nick wanted to go on chatting with the zombies, but Troy held his head pressed against his neck, felt his breath against his skin, and his heart beating fast against his chest. He waited for the herd to pass, so he could let go of Nick again. Not because he wanted to let go, but because Nick was agitated and wanted to move. 

This was not what Troy would have liked their first date to be like.


	3. Lust

**Lust**

They were all bloody mess and giggles. Nick was on his next adrenaline high from his stunt with the zombies, and Troy was so relieved they were still alive, that he could not stay mad at him. He could not remember how they got into the building again, or where they even were. He was just focused on Nick, grabbing for his arms, quickly scanning them for bites. Nick smiled his best drugged smile. "Want to look at my body?" he slurred. "You're into me. You're so into me."

Troy pondered whether he should deny or agree, but Nick simply leaned against the wall and pulled him closer, into a wet, sloppy kiss. Troy pulled away. As much as he wanted it, this was not how they would do it. He put a finger onto Nick's mouth, which the younger started licking eagerly, despite the bloody remainders of their earlier adventure. Troy moaned, surprised. Encouraged, Nick grabbed for his whole hand. His tongue slit between Troy's fingers, then he cupped one fingertip with his lips and sucked it fiercely. Troy could feel the sensation rushing through his whole body. What Nick's tongue did to his fingertips made his skin elsewhere tingle with joy and full of hopes.

He could barely hold back anymore. When Nick grabbed for his hips to pull him closer and kiss him again, he not only let it happen, but could feel himself pressing into Nick beneath him. He grabbed one of Nick's wrists and pinned it against the rough wall. In turn, Nick started rolling his hips, pushing against his crotch, away from the wall, while at the same time his free arm pulled Troy back against his body.   
Troy had to brace himself against the wall with his free hand. He looked down and met Nick's eyes as the other was looking up to him. He looked determined. The friction was pure lust and dazed his mind. With parted lips and soft, quiet moans Troy invited the younger to kiss him again. He knew they could have just continued chafing and finished their little encounter right there, but he wanted more. If this was both his first and his last time, he wanted it to be special, not desperate. 

It was almost painful to separate from the hot, dear body beneath him. Nick bit his lip to keep them connected, but Troy forced himself away. He took Nick by his wrist and dragged him along into the next free room. There was a mattress Troy aimed for, but Nick took over again. This time it was Nick pushing Troy against the wall, and he was rough and impatient doing so. He grabbed his shirt and just tore it open, not caring that the buttons flew off into the room's dusty corners. He also stripped out of his own bloody tee, then he pushed his arm against Troy's torso, almost stopping his breath. Troy tried to free himself, but Nick's other hand had already opened his belt and slipped into his pants. "We play by my rules," Nick hissed at him to make him comply.

He did not know when it was that they had switched from giggly to eager and angry, but Troy enjoyed Nick's lead. He felt his hand tugging at his dick, and it was the best thing that had ever happened to him. Eventually Nick also removed his restraining arm from Troy's body, so Troy could hug him, and keep him close.

It did not take him long. His breath got faster and turned into whimpers. Just then, Nick lowered himself into a squatting position, pulled Troy's aching dick out of his pants and gave its tip a good, long kiss. Feeling his tongue running over the glans, Troy spilled into his mouth. His legs were shaking, his muscles cramping, and yet he was feeling better than ever before.  
He toppled over and Nick could barely change his position in time to catch him without either getting hurt. Nick's neck and shoulders hit the mattress, and he kept lying there, not moving, with a panting Troy on top of him. It made him chuckle quietly.

As best he might, Troy raised himself and reached down for Nick's pants, but Nick took Troy's hands and pulled them back up again, placing them around his chest. "It's useless," the younger said. " If I had known we would end here, I'd taken less."  
He gave him one of his sincere smiles, and a tight hug.

"Maybe you're right," Nick mumbled, falling asleep. "Maybe I stayed because I love you."


End file.
